This is what I did at Jane Wayne Day!!! I found this pic on Ft. Benning's website. This is the exact place one of our obstacles took place. It was AWESOME! 

This is me (on the right in the green) and my friend Kathy. Her daugher Emily is in the middle. I thought it was a cute picture until I realized I had vampire eyes! 

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I am sick for the first time in a LONG time! Looks like the stress might be getting to me. Its fall break and all I'm doing is sitting around the house because I feel like crap! Oh well... On another note, a girl in my class is trying to set me up with this guy...but as soon as I agreed to it, I kicked myself in the ass. I don't want to go out looking, that doesn't work, not to mention hes only 5'8, maybe I'm in denial about the fact that it sounded alright until she dropped that. For those of you who don't know me, that's how tall I am, and I have a complex about not dating short guys. They don't have to be huge, but I would like to wear my heels and still be shorter (even if only by a little). So needless to say I'm not looking forward to meeting the guy. Is that mean of me? The bottom line is, I'm still in the rebound phase--no not like what you are thinking. I want to meet someone and hit it off so I will forget about Josh because I feel that is the only way to move on. But on the other hand, I'm not ready to date, and don't feel I have anything to offer right now. I'm still too sinister to be able to charm some new guy. Right now I view love as a load of shit. The fact that you can tell someone you love them, and then a week later tell them you never want to see them again? That isnt love, but I know in my heart Josh did love me. Ok I'm not getting into that again, all I am saying is that as of now, love is over rated.

Babies!

I went to my pre-clinical tour at the medical center today, and our group (which was 10 out of the 76 students) were able to do something special! We were able to go into PICU (the pediatric Intensive Care Unit) to tour, and talk to some of the nurses. We got to see babies up close that were only 25 weeks old, weighing barely a pound. They looked like little dolls! It was so awesome to see the little babies. Hopefully they will all pull through and mature so that they can be discharged home to their mothers. Today, we got to tour different floors and stations in the hospital, but seeing the babies was the highlight for me. I may change my mind after completing my rotations, but if I work in the hospital, I want to be in either labor and delivery or PICU. If I work in an office (which would have MUCH better hours and holidays off) I want to work for a plastic surgeon...and NO not for the free lipo!

Jane Wayne Day

I had one of the coolest days of my life yesturday. I went to Jane Wayne day at Ft. Benning ga with Kathy and her family. We had a blast. It is a day for rangers’ wives and their friends to go through the obstacle courses, jump towers, and generally to see what it is like in the day of a ranger. We started off going out the jump towers which are 34 feet high. It doesn’t look bad from the ground, but if you even have the slightest fear of height, I promise you wouldn’t jump! They make it 34 feet because between 30-40 feet is suppose to be the scariest height to jump from. Anything lower seems easy, and anything much higher isn’t “realistic” looking. They suited us up with full gear, parachutes, helmets and all! We walked up the stairs, they hooked us up to the cord, and told us to tuck our neck to our chest and jump! I normally have no fear but I made the mistake of looking down first. I had to take a minute, and then I said what the hell, I’m definitely going to do it so I might as well jump, and I did! It was such a rush. Kathy’s 9 year old son Jason did it 5 times! Our next task was rappelling which was my favorite event of the day. We again suited up, and began on the 25 ft. rappel towers where you walk down a wall. It was fun, but I had a difficult time using my break. I got stuck, but managed to finish with a bang! On site, there was a second rappelling tower that, for the first time, was open to the public. I knew this was a once in a life time chance, so I took it. It was 60 feet high and had no wall to rappel down. It was basically a free fall. Nothing but air, and you. It was AWESOME! I can’t begin to describe how empowering it was to know that I was doing this by myself, and that I was controlling my life. We threw hatchets, and shot bow and arrows. We ate MRE’s for lunch, which was pretty cool. We then went to the confidence course where I climbed up and over these logs. It was known as the confidence climb. It was run as a relay with our team. At the end, the entire team got in the mud on our hands and knees and crawled through the mud under barbed wire. Our entire bodies were submerged, and people were kicking up mud all over eachother. We were able to rinse off afterwards, and then went to the last event. We did a boat race with paddles, racing other teams. It was fun, and another ‘wet’ event. The day ended about 3:30 pm. I left with quite the sun burn, but all in all, it was an unbelievable day. I think the Army would be challenging, and it is something I would love to do. I love challenging myself physically, more so than just endurance. I hopefully will return next year, and in the mean time, I will be keeping my eyes peeled for opportunities similar to this one!

What if...(Thanks Lisanne!)

What if …
1] … you could do absolutely *anything* you wanted to right now? Where would you go? What activity would you choose? Would you do it alone or with friends/family? Why? I am going to answer this question honestly, even though 50 people are going to slap be right now. I would be campling at Little Jo with Josh. I am trying to move on, but when you give your heart to someone, you don't always get it back.
2] … you suddenly found $500 in your wallet, all for you [with no catches]. What would you do with it? Why? Funny, I actually did find $500 yesturday, in my school bank account that is. I got the nursing scholarship I applied for. Unfortunitly, that money has to go towards school. If I could spend it, I would save it so that I can buy a new car when I graduate.
3] … you could trade places with someone right now, just for a day? Who would you choose, and why? What do you think it would feel like to be that person? I wish I could be Josh, that way I would know his real reasons for breaking my heart, and if all the cruel things he said to me were true.
4] … you woke up tomorrow with powers of invisibility, but the effect would only last for a few days? Where would you go, and what would you do? Who would you “spy” on? In which situation would you most like to be an unnoticed “fly on the wall”? Oh easy, to Hollywood, or where ever Brad Pitt happens to be at the moment. I'm sorry if it is cliche, but he is the most gorgeous man in the world, and I would love to see him in person without getting arrested for harassment. Yeah, id be following him into the shower....a hem!
5] … you could choose *one* song NEVER to hear ever again in your life? Which song would it be? How about *one* song to ONLY hear for the rest of your life? I would never want to hear that Gwen Stefani remake of the fiddler on the roof song...if I were a rich girl. Not only is she the worst singer next to Britney Spears, but you cannot turn fiddler on the roof into pop music. And only one song to hear for the rest of my life...probably I'll be by Edwin McCain.

Long time no blog...

I know it has been forever and a half since I have even posted anything, but I haven't even been in the mood! I do have some good news. I got in the nursing program! All of the worry was for nothing. School is going well. It is definitly a challenge, but I have managed to get B's on my first 2 tests, and have stayed above the average test grade! I haven't been doing well in the relationship department...although I feel like I have let go somewhat. Josh and I had been talking through emails, and then I realized it wasn't doing any good. There will always be a place in my heart for him, but all he is going to do is drag me down. I told him I never wanted to hear from him again, and made him promise not to contact me. (for those of you that don't know, he has been known to come back) I know im my heart that it is over, but by me taking the initiative to cut all ties, I feel like I am slowly allowing myself to let go. In all honesty, our relationship ended at the best possible time. I am so busy, I would barely have time for us if we were still together. Still haven't officially moved on because I haven't had the oppertunity for a date. Speaking of which, I met someone (but it can't go anywhere because I don't know his phone number!!!) and i felt a connection with him, but neither of us know eachothers last names or phone numbers. I should have been bold and ask for his when we met, but I wussed out. Maybe we will meet again...until then I will be eating out at Olive Garden a lot!

I HATE MEN

Ok well maybe not all of them. I am trying to keep my focus off Josh, and on other things, or people I should say. There is a really nice guy that comes in where I work, and we are going to hang out together sometime soon. The problem...he is seeing someone. Now I realize this is probably some rebound thinking, but I am interested in him. He seems like someone you could spend everyday with and enjoy every minute. He was honest and upfront with me about dating someone, and I don't know how serious it is, and I am NOT going to try to steal him away...but it would be nice to atleast have a friend right now, and if it goes somewhere, then yay for me! I suggested going fishing for our first friendly outing...nothing that would normally be considered a date, and nothing that costs money. Any other suggestions?